Supply “why” a visitor should attend your next meeting. By Tim Houston and Claudia MacDermott

You meet Joe at a party.  Seems like a nice guy.  When he tells you about his line of work, you realize he is someone worth inviting to your BNI chapter.  His profession is open, and you believe he could be a good fit for the group.  You tell Joe a little about BNI and invite him to come as your guest next week.  "Sounds good.  I'll definitely try to make it."  Joe says, as he smiles and shakes your hand.

"Great!  I will see you next week” you say and leave the conversation feeling pretty good because you met a prospect and invited him.  He sounds interested and you are looking forward to having a guest at the meeting.

Next week, you arrive early and keep an eye on the door.  You tell some members you are expecting a guest.  But Joe doesn't show.  You now agree with the conventional wisdom: Inviting visitors to your BNI chapter is hard.  Many are invited, but few actually show up.

There are legitimate reasons why people don't attend.  But there are two main reasons:

1) People won't commit to something that's not familiar.

2) People are fearful of putting themselves in a situation where someone is going to "sell" them.

When you invite, your words and tone ought to convey enthusiasm.  That’s important, but often not enough. The person you invite needs information—so they understand the benefits. People make decisions based on information and assumptions from their life experiences. They might think: I don't really know this person all that well. I am not sure why they are inviting me. It's not clear what the benefits are. I've heard things like this before. I am uncomfortable saying no.

When you want someone to come to your chapter meeting, you have to “supply the why.” You need to answer their question WIIFM (What's in it for me?), so they will commit to attending.

The Answer to “WIIFM”

How do you get them to say yes? Think back to when you invited Joe; you may have told him about some of the people or how BNI has helped your business.   That’s great, but Joe is interested in Joe.  That's normal; we are all interested in ourselves.

Because you haven't engaged Joe, he takes the easy way out and says, "Sounds good. I'll definitely try to make it."  Were he listening to your conversation with Joe, Dr. Ivan Misner would point out that you tried to go from the first stages of Visibility right straight to Profitability.

The solution is to engage him through questions. You need to know more about Joe. You need to give him the opportunity to connect to you and to his "why":  Why interrupt his life? Why risk anything to come to your meeting?

Questions can dissipate Joe’s doubts.  For example: "Joe, if you were able to reach your sales goals in a shorter period of time, how would you use that extra time?"  (See Bob Burg's “10 Networking Questions that Work Every Time" in Masters of Networking.)

Stop. Open your ears and your mind and listen to what Joe has to say.  It may take him a minute to answer.  He may be stunned because no one has ever asked him such a question.  Give him the opportunity to speak about what matters to him.   Then ask how you can help him get that extra time.

Joe is likely to say, "Refer me business," or "Introduce me to…"  Now you can offer a solution: "Joe, I may be able to help you. Many of the people you want to meet are part of my inner circle.  We have developed relationships based on trust and refer business to each other regularly.  We're going to be meeting this week for breakfast. I would be happy to introduce you to my colleagues.  Would you like to meet them?”

Joe's likely response? Yes!

Tell him to bring an adequate number of business cards as he will be meeting many local business and professional people.  (Joe will be visualizing a room full of people.)  Help Joe make the firm commitment by saying, "I will be happy to reserve a spot for you and let my colleagues know you will be attending.  I need to know by noon tomorrow that you will be there.  If I have not heard from you by then, I will call you."

Joe is likely to commit at that time, but if he's not sure of his schedule, give him a short deadline.  Too long a deadline says this isn't urgent and lessens the benefit.  Why call him if he doesn't call you?  Because you are in charge of the growth of your chapter.

If Joe declines, thank him for his time.  Move on.  Don't chase him.  There are many other prospects waiting for the opportunity. And remember, ask the questions that “supply the why” and you will “cause the because.”